After a year of being The Medium’s cupid, I’ve realized many things about this crazy big thing called love.
I’ve received both positive and negative feedback for starting a column with no stated credentials—each I am equally grateful for. I’ve tried my best to answer your questions, provide a listening ear, and share my experiences with you.
Reading your questions and stories made me realize that we all share experiences. This only reminds me that you are never alone.
Last week, an anonymous individual sent me an email regarding one of my recent FLWL entries. The individual stated that my advice of loving oneself before being loved by others was “bad and harmful.” They mentioned that people are capable of being loved even if they do not love themselves, and that loving yourself is not easy, that it takes time and a journey. I agree with both points, and I apologize if my initial answer was insensitive or unclear.
Self-love is the hardest love of all. I never said it was easy. But it is also the most important love of all. Rome wasn’t built in one day, neither is self-love.
Self-confidence, dependence, mental health, and past experiences all play into self-love—putting aside your past or present circumstances to make room for you is not an easy feat. It took me a very long time to learn to love myself—and I still have my days when I don’t. But, as I’ve faced hardships in my life, be it heartbreak, loss, failure, or disappointment, with each added ounce of self-love, I’ve been able to handle those situations better and look inward for answers.
The individual who submitted their feedback—who I thank for letting me think introspectively—signed their letter, “If you don’t love yourself, I love you.” I echo the sentiment. I love you all and thank you for allowing me to have this space. I hope you find love—be it within yourself, from others, for others, or with others. Love is fragile, and so are you. Give yourself time and forgive yourself and those around you. You will never have all the answers, but you will find your truth.
Always and forever with love,
Liz (who is recently single and exercising every ounce of self-love) xo
Editor-in-Chief (Volume 48 & 49) | firstname.lastname@example.org — Liz is completing a double major in Chemistry and Art History. She previously served as Features Editor for Volume 47, and Editor-in-Chief for Volume 48. Liz is extremely excited to have spent her time as an undergrad at The Medium, and can’t wait to inspire others and be inspired in her final year at UTM. When she’s not studying, working, writing, or editing countless articles, you can find her singing Motown hits at her piano, going on long walks by the lake, or listening to music. You can connect with Liz on her website, Instagram, or LinkedIn.