Love at first script? How reality TV shapes modern love
Reality TV is a double-edged sword, promoting open-mindedness and entertainment while building unrealistic expectations, unhealthy behaviours, and competition.
The music crescendos, your dream man approaches, and your heart leaps. He holds out a rose, and he’s just about to give it to you when—
You realize it’s not real.
This sweeping, romantic gesture is usually from a script designed for dramatics. Shows like Love Island, Love is Blind, and Too Hot to Handle take the world by storm with every season, but are they a true reflection of modern relationships, or are they distorting our view?
Why Am I Watching?
Recently, reality dating shows have amassed massive audiences, dynamically changing dating norms. Where fictional characters provide little comfort, viewers are turning to reality TV to form real connections. The people on the screen are sources of relatability, navigating love in familiar ways.
Moreover, these shows introduce original premises that challenge conventional approaches to dating. Love Is Blind disregards physical appearance, Love Island tests commitment with constant obstacles, and Too Hot to Handle favours emotional connections instead of sexual ones. These new angles to love draw us in and keep us intrigued, changing the criteria we use to determine compatibility.
Too Hot to Handle, But Ready to Grow
Beyond dating, reality shows are a fresh form of entertainment, with weekly episodes and unpredictable, constant drama. They can be a form of escapism, where we can forget about our worries, speculating outcomes and debating contestants’ choices.
Furthermore, with new selections of shows focusing on everything from arranged marriages to masked dates, we can find optimism hidden within reality TV. Successful relationships in any category can develop a positive outlook and even encourage open communication. Seeing individual opinions reflected on a screen can spark conversation between friends and partners, contributing to healthy connections.
Is Love Truly Blind?
Unfortunately, it’s not always a positive experience. While as many as 54 percent of respondents in one study learned about dating through reality TV, most internalize unhealthy behaviours and competitive culture.
In a short-term reality show, relationships are portrayed as unhealthy, fast-paced, and lacking commitment, such as with Love Island, where contestants are constantly recoupled with the introduction of new “bombshells.” As a result, they experience little emotional connection and normalize competitive or envious behaviour.
Similarly, shows like Too Hot to Handle can negatively impact self-esteem, creating unattainable beauty standards. It can showcase the effects of “hookup culture”, overemphasizing sexual activity and attractiveness.
Finally, while Love is Blind supposedly disregards physical appearance, contestants are often discriminatory and demeaning to one another. They aggressively compete and depict relationship struggles that normalize poor communication and acceptance of conflict. The show also promotes betrayal or “ghosting” after one has won the game, creating distrust and conflict in viewers’ relationships.
So, the next time you watch your favourite TV shows, take everything with a grain of salt. Their portrayal of love might not be as real as you think.
